c.v. - ADDITIONAL SKILLS

WEBSITE DESIGN

In addition to this website, I (either by myself or collaboratively) designed and built the following websites.  In the case of the Xenos website, I built an early version, much of which remains, but Rob has taken over maintenance; for Tutti.org, I was on the committee that developed the design; affetto.co.nz and sorrysong.com.au were solo efforts (now, for various reasons now hosted on philipgriffin.com after arriving here via the URLs).

Sub-editing:

Radio Broadcasting:

Proficiency in the following computer programs (Windows and Macintosh platforms):

Score, Sibelius - Music Typesetting Software
MS-Office (courses in Excel & Word), Corel WordPerfect, Adobe Creative Suite & Production Suite,
Digidesign ProTools, Logic, FinalCutPro (video-editing software) 

ORNITHOLOGICAL AND HERPETOLOGICAL CONSULTANT:

Maker of individual clothing:

trousers for Sir Michael Tippett as worn to European première of Byzantium (BBC Proms 1991, BBC Symphony Orchestra conducted by Sir Andrew  Davis)

“The 86-year-old Tippett made his way carefully on to the Albert Hall platform sporting a bright scarlet jacket, an equally bright yellow T-shirt and multi-coloured trousers of an almost headache-inducing garishness. Our distinguished octogenarian composer looked like a bird of paradise that had accidentally navigated a few thousand miles off course.”

Malcolm Hayes in Daily Telegraph, August 1991

NOT BEING OTHER PHILIP GRIFFINS

So, I'm me.  I had the dubious honour of acquiring the email address philipgriffin@gmail.com when google was starting up the gmail service. Good, because I can tell people my address, and it's easy to remember - if they can a) remember my name and b) spell Philip with one L.  So far, so good.  However, there are other people in the world called Philip Griffin.

Like  Philip Griffin, the Adelaide Plastic Surgeon who also plays music (viola and maybe other things) in doctors' orchestras and probably other settings.  When I lived in Adelaide and had to make medical appointments, you could often feel the confusion from the other end of the phone when I rang as presumably they knew the surgeon.  I’m told he’s very nice.

Or Philip Griffin, would you believe another musician, this time in Austin, Texas.  I've been sent confirmation details of gigs from venues in the past; where to park, what the fee is, when to arrive, all that stuff.  Great, but a bit far away. More recently the band toured to Georgia, USA and all the car hire contracts came to me.

Or Philip Griffin the car-yard owner.  I get lots of car emails.  "Come and check this car" that sort of thing

Or Philip Griffin the Southern Baptist Minister (who of course uses lots of music in his worship)

Or Philip Griffin the award-winning ICT teacher in England - boy have I had some emails that were supposed to be for him!

Or Philip Griffin the post-doctoral fellow at the University of Pennsylvania in ionic liquids, polymers and my very favourite - polymer nanocomposites

Or Philip Griffin the high-profile (like Prince, Paul McCartney, Amy Winehouse, Bon Jovi and Britney Spears) dancer, choreographer, film-maker and photographer

Or Philip Griffin Maths Professor at Syracuse University and author of such show-stoppers as Asymptotic distributions of the overshoot and undershoots for the Levy insurance risk process in the Cramer and convolution equivalent cases

Or Philip Griffin Chairman of the N Gauge Society (formed in 1967 by a small group of N Gauge modellers from West Yorkshire - the Society’s aims then, as now, were to promote the gauge and encourage active participation in N Gauge railway modelling)

And that's not to mention Philip Giffin the film composer and producer (OK, seeing as how we’re talking about him - click here for more)

I could go on...

I imagine that seeing as how I have philipgriffin.com, plenty of people looking for the other guys might come here, in which case...  HI!

Over the years I have received via email - presumably intended for subtle variations in philipgriffin@gmail.com:

• travel Itinerary for a European Holiday - flights, hotels, other bookings - of course they were all in "my" name

• full financial spreadsheet details of a parent of one the other Philip Griffin's from a sibling in a "how are we going to manage our ageing parent's financial situation?" kind of conversation

• a contract offering me a job at a university

• a full confession from a sinner, totally inspired by one of my recent sermons

• "What am I going to do Pastor? My son is a drug addict!"

• my new caravan insurance policy documents

• on the same day - an email finalising arrangements for the supply of 10 cadavers for a conference and another asking me to provide accreditation for the Top End Health Service

• detailed costing for my kitchen renovation following our meeting this morning

• securtiy (sic) clearance and password to use the US Navy's NASIS website - seems strange but came from a navy.mil email address

• following up on our conversation about me being a soloist in your orchestra - slight headspin moment until I realised it wasn't me

• email from my brother (I don't have one) - how's the trip to Japan going?

• dear fellow Quaker, my husband and I would like to introduce ourselves as the new overseers for your region - very appropriate from The Society of Friends!

• quote to use a crypt in a North London church for some kind of funeral service

• "Hi Philip, I trust you are doing well. If you are not doing anything and would like to do so, I would love your company next weekend. Take good care, Your Mom" (my mother had died 5 months earlier)

• "I've taken the liberty of adding you to the database of the Australasian Journal of Plastic Surgery" - hmmm, I do have a bit of a background in bird taxidermy, I wonder whether that's what got me in?

• As well as the database addition, here is a commercial-in-confidence copy of the results of the research project an international team of plastic surgeons (me included) have been working on for years and expect to sell for millions of dollars.

• Your £19.50 Snuggle Slipper Boots (magenta-coloured) are ready to be picked up from Marks and Spencers Hackney Store today. Sorely tempting, except it’s corona-virus frenzy, and I’d have to self-isolate for 14 days when I got back from picking them up.

• Strangely, two of my namesakes are looking for new cars during the Northern Hemisphere COVID-19-laced summer of 2020. The Canadian non-me is after a Fiat, whilst the British model is leaning more towards a Peugeot.

• questionnaire to make sure that my needs would be fully met in my upcoming consultation with a leading dog-trainer

• Quote for purchase and installation of a stage-truck for my grand piano

• Following a reply from me that I was not the customer of a Georgian (USA not Caucasian) Injury Centre that they were looking for. “I have removed your email from our database; however, i do show that someone with your name and email came in on Feb 17th. If you want more information about that visit please feel free to give us a call. I do not show that you had a 2nd visit and usually that is when the doctor goes over what he has found during his xrays and exam if you went thru that process.” OK, so your database must be right, I must have been there, but for some reason don’t want to hear the insight gained from my xrays…
  Then a follow-up email a year later, just to check whether I’d changed my mind…

• “Dear Dr. Griffin, I shall be posting your two notes to you today - international tracked number: XXXXXXX The customs docket states paper ephemera value £70 (face value).” When the sender was alerted that I was not her Dr. Griffin, the reply - “Apologies – it was google that gave me your email!” So, let me get this straight, you take an order over the internet that doesn’t involve getting an email address, then just randomly google up one? OK, got it!

• Ongoing - tens of emails from AT&T, all from an unmonitored address, and I can’t find anywhere an email to contact support to let them know - when you go to support it’s - please login to your account. Emails like this: “welcome to AT&T” “It’s great that you’re with us” “Here’s your first bill” “Here’s a reminder for your first bill” “Why haven’t you paid your bill?” “Your bill is overdue” “We’re going to cut you off and take legal action” “thanks for paying your bill” “Here’s your second bill” “Here’s a reminder for your second bill” “Why haven’t you paid your bill?” “Your bill is overdue” “We’re going to cut you off and take legal action” “thanks for paying your bill” …
  But then - finally - an email wondering why I never responded to their emails, so could I confirm my email address, please? - still no return address, just click on the link to confirm (which of course I didn’t). So everything’s solved, right?
  Then: “Why haven’t you paid your bill?” “Your bill is overdue” “We’re going to cut you off and take legal action” “thanks for paying your bill” …

• an email from the New York State Psychiatric Institute - Cleared to Report - “Jane Doe” - Based on a screening completed at 2021-08-09 06:08:46, “Jane Doe” appears to be healthy and should be reporting as scheduled.
  hmmm, they obviously take confidentiality real serious like!

• an email confirming my order from a secure facility (well, secure apart from the reliability of the email address) to me as the person billed, sending a vast list of groceries to (I’m guessing) my son, an inmate at the Central Michigan Correctional Facility.

• On the up-side - I’ve made some great friends, like the Real Estate Agent in Lake Arrowhead, California who’s trying to contact the Griffin family (headed by Philip) so that she can convince them to sell their house. We chat about how google doesn’t discriminate regarding how many periods/full-stops you include in an email address (she keeps adding them to my email in the hope they go to someone new, but they all come to me) and also capitalism. She says I’m the best, and she wishes I had a house to sell in Lake Arrowhead.

• about 200-300 other emails - all returned to sender pointing out that I was not the person they were looking for. If only I were a songwriter, this would have to be the basis of a good song...

People getting my name wrong

My father’s name was David - When I was a child, I was frequently called David accidentally.

My conducting (and many other things) teacher at the conservatorium was called Richard - When I was at the con I was frequently called Richard accidentally.

Which brings me to:

NOT BEING PETER GRIFFIN

Frequent conversation:

Them: First name?

Me: Philip

Them: Surname?

Me: Griffin

Them: OK Peter, when can I book you in for …

THERE IS, HOWEVER:

a lizard named after me. No, seriously…

and I named an island in the Houtman Abrolhos, Western Australia.

and successfully nominated two outstanding citizens to receive Order of Australia Medals in 2021.
Their modesty forbids me to mention their names, outstanding in modesty as in other areas.